Sorry doesn't make it okay

Sometimes I have done something I shouldn't have, or more often, not done something I should have. I do it repeatedly then I say something like 'I'm so bad' or 'I'm such a bad person'.

I think that means I'm sorry or I think that absolves me.

I feel disempowered. I feel like that's all I'm capable of. I lose integrity.

The truth is...I am not bad, I am not a bad person. I am choosing to behave badly and I am capable of better.

And with that truth, with that idea challenged, I have no excuse.

I want to nurture my integrity and lately I haven't always chosen that path.

But I am capable of more...